P!nk throws everything but the kitchen sink into her ‘True Love (feat. Lily Allen)’ video, featuring Lily Allen

I’m a little late to the party with this one (by two days, which in modern social media entertainment pop music times means its about 2029) but had to write something about this because…

its bloody P!nk.

This woman is probably one of the best popstars on the planet, and although the singles from her The Truth About Love album have been played pretty heavily on the radio (especially Just Give Me a Reason featuring .fun‘s Nate Ruess) I get the feeling she’s always been bubbling under the top of the pop pantheon where the BeyoncesMadonna‘s and Lady Gaga’s reside. Having said that, Get This Party Started and So What will probably be forever ingrained into public conciousness, and rightly so. 

That’s why I want to make a bit of noise about the video for new single True Love. It should be an event, because its a) a new P!nk music video, b) it features another of my treasured but still underrated potty mouth pop heroine, who’s second album is my favourite of.All.TIME by the way, Lily Allen (well, Lily Rose Cooper but even the video title says Allen) and c) it’s pretty very good.

It’s a combination of sorts. There’s lots of shots of her singing the song on tour, as is common for acts without the time and possibly money to make a totally new video for single #4 from an album whilst on the road, mixed with a glimpse into her family being backstage and errr… cycling around whilst rehearsing.

Not sure what this word means to be honest...

Not sure what this word means to be honest…

This is intercut with some greenscreen-y, colour graded in that retro pop art way, multiple P!nk’s, bright backgrounds and shapes and whatnot, which would make a very nice video if it carried on that way till the end. But, when we get to the end of the second chorus…

There’s some shots of P!nk and her daughter playing with sock puppets and strange plush vegetables that look ever so slightly creepy. Then sock puppet to the camera greenscreen ‘action’ followed by well, Lily Allen chopping up a carrot in the most sinster way possible. And the carrot has a face! It’s like there’s some sort of message about vegetarians and ‘what would the world be like if vegetables had feelings too’ in there somewhere but then Lily puts them in a blender and it becomes a whirlwind of P!nk and some green things.

You're keeping control of the knife, but I'm not your darlin' (obligatory Girls Aloud reference)

You’re keeping control of the knife, but I’m not your darlin’ (obligatory Girls Aloud reference)

How did we even get to this point? It doesn’t make sense! What’s it got to do with love?!?

It’s silly and maybe a bit trippy but all in all, I’m having too much fun to care.

Please let this one be a hit, you can do it British public – it took long enough but we all finally got Icona Pop to Number One.

I have nothing...

I couldn’t screencap it at the right time to get the knife chopping carrots in the background. But it happens, trust me.

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Casting The New Doctor

Lots has happened in the week so lets quickly recap that.

Game of Thrones was amazing.

I wrote an article for big and important website Popjustice, but alas it hasn’t been published yet.

The Apprentice was on.

I didn’t watch it, or blog about it.

I was writing the PJ article instead.

I had a real job interview. It was not like The Apprentice.

I didn’t get the job. Though I looked dapper in a waistcoat.

Matt Smith announced the Christmas Special will be his last on Doctor Who.

To make up for the lack of Apprentice, and to contribute to the internet’s musings over who will replace Smith, I offer the BBC an idea…

CAST THE NEW DOCTOR THROUGH AN APPRENTICE STYLE REALITY SHOW!

Doctor Who Fired

I mean what could possibly go wrong? It is actually genius, think about it…

  • I didn’t watch or write about The Apprentice last week, this is the final piece of evidence that people are getting bored of it, after nine whole series’. This show is like that one, so there is familiarity, and the Who connection will bring in the viewers.
  • The BBC loves gimmicky reality shows, it recommissioned The Voice for a third run this week.
  • It will be television gold. Think of tasks such as trying not to get killed by a Dalek, speaking gibberish really fast, HAMMY ACTING!, pretending that each new Monster of the Week is more dangerous than the last and trying to negotiate Moffat’s convoluted plotting with a straight face.
  • Whilst they are at it, they may want to cast a new companion too. Clara is pretty dull character, so why not have six pretty ladies vie for the role of the companion to give the show sex appeal and bring in more viewers.
  • Whilst they are at doing that other thing they are whilst they are it-ing, why not do a BBC Four spinoff looking for a new showrunner. It’ll be about writers and that’s intellectual. Diversity!
  • The Whoniverse needs some new spinoffs after Confidential and The Sarah Jane Adventures got cancelled, and Torchwood mutated into something that… wasn’t Torchwood. The Beeb is all about brands, identity, expansion and all that. It’s perfect.

So there’s a few of my clearly jokey musings. Hardcore fans and the BBC, do not take this seriously and thereby blacklist me from ever being in your employ. Comments and further ideas are welcome. Thanks for reading!